How women get a wine…. From a man’s point of view
Recently I have been seeing article after article about all the different ways men try, succeed and fail at begging asking for a wine in fetes and on the road.
Well, today I’m here to flip the script.
Carnival is that magical place where the normal rules of parties do not apply. It’s a place where as a decent and healthy looking man you can be the object of desire and women come looking for a wine from YOU! (so I have heard)
Well, let’s discuss the different ways that guys are approached and the little subtle and not so subtle moves the ladies use on us!
1. Sexy and I know it
This young lady has come to party and has no time to waste with shenanigans and innuendo. When she approaches it is with supreme confidence and whether she is a 10 or a 6 it doesn’t matter much. The confidence she exudes demands respect…. You MUST give her a wine!
2. The sneaker
You are here and there taking wine when, while in a particularly good dance you feel someone sneak up behind you. This is the sneaker. She infiltrates wines in progress and after a short while becomes the wine in progress. Give her a wine man!
3. Double trouble
You could be minding your business, resting your tired waistline when from out of nowhere a pair of women descend on you with a wining sandwich that really, no man should refuse. This is the double trouble wine. When girls seek out wine in small packs it makes them virtually unstoppable. They gain courage and do “things” that most women by themselves wouldn’t dare do! You have no choice….surrender the wine!
4. The looker
Everywhere you go you feel the pressure of someones gaze. Eventually you see her, her gaze is unwavering from across the fete. Right at you! calling out to you!
From the moment you make eye contact, she has you in her grips. If you’re mid wine with another female, she will command you over with eyes. At that moment, you have a decision to make: Release the so-so partner you are with (out of courtesy, keep it moving until the chorus) or look away. Looking away is always the wrong answer.
5. The ninja
This girl love the climb, the thrill of being literally swept off her feet in a wine, and she isnt giving you any choice in the matter. Most of the time the only warning you get is an expanding shadow forming around you as she leaps from whatever scaffolding she was climbing to jump on you. Your back better be strong cause she will laugh if you fall!
6. The line winer
You have been at the bar forever while the fete rages behind you. Waiting patiently till you are close enough to actually catch the eye of a bartender. Just as you get close in squeezes a young lady… Setting you back yet again. Fortunately this a a line winer. Willing and eager to give you a wine in exchange for your spot. Stay thirsty my friend!
I know I have missed many of your techniques ladies. I think you girls are much sneakier than the guys when it comes to all this. Fill us in!
Which one are you?
